Diet Day 25: Planning the Weekend and Bad Breath

My weekends always seem to have a mind of their own. Over the past two years, I can count the number of weekends in which I didn’t have a dinner, a party, an outing, the theatre, or other plans in general already figured out. One one hand its a little frustrating. On the other, it means I’m rarely bored.

Now before anyone gets mad at me for complaining about my burgeoning social schedule, let me remind you of one simple fact about socializing. There’s usually food and/or drink.

Seriously! Think about the last five times you hung out with 1-10 friends. The last time you went anywhere.  Food happened either before or after… or was possibly the central fixture of the meeting.  Now, imagine having a strict one meal a day diet. Following me? And you have 2-3 activities planned in a day… (and the rusty gears churn) Because of this food fallacy I often find the weekend to be my hardest contender. When you hang out with friends you often want to be a gracious guest/host… be sociable  And if you’re not willing to dip a damn chip in the dip then you might as well become a hobo on the street (though store dips are easier to sneer at, especially for me since half of them use either lactose or apple cider vinegar and I happen to have an allergic reaction~! 🙂 ). It’s the darndest thing, really (not the allergies, but well, yes, but in this case I mean the etiquette) and all I have to say is social etiquette is a bitch.

In the beginning you can get away with “Well I’m on this diet” and they’re all supportive, but then after a while its like, “SHUT UP AND EAT THE DAMN BEAN DIP”. And while bean dip might contain cheese… and I’m okay with small amounts of it (its really the less cultured things like yogurt, ice cream, milk and sour cream that cause me MASSIVE discomfort… and when Cortez is uncomfortable, he rebels like a salsa dancer on speed), that means that I have to plan finger food to be my one meal of the day and I just-  I mean, you give up making a roast as at home with fresh made mashed potatoes for finger food that probably wasn’t home made? I know I wouldn’t (sorry for the TMI, by the by).

When beginning this diet, it occurred to me that there would be several downsides to dieting.

  1. I don’t get to eat as much tasty, amazing food.
  2. Instead of spending evening working on personal art projects/ software projects, I now work out 2-3 times a week.
  3. It’s Hard. I know that sounds stupid. But on some level every fat kid out there is fat because if losing weight was easy it’d be done in a heart-beat.  So seriously… Every day I’m motivated and empowered, but its still hard.

The one down side I knew about but didn’t sink in was the bad breath. The Medical term is called ketosis.  This is what occurs when your body starts to break down proteins for immediate energy, and as a result fat cells. I’m sure my older brother’s girlfriend (who’s a med student) would correct me (and I welcome it!), but basically… if you have bad breath its for 1 of three reasons (another list! Yay!):

  1. You don’t brush your teeth/have horrible oral hygiene (yes, other people can tell when its been a few days. Trust me).  Which includes br- (OFFENSIVE! 😡 … Anywho) Which includes brushing the tongue and occasional gargling (just so folks know).
  2. You’ve got an infection whether in your mouth or throat which can be caused by poor hygiene or an illness. Such as a sinus infection, or strep throat.
  3. Your body’s shifted to needing to break down proteins more readily to maintain energy levels.

So if you’re dieting and 1 or 2 aren’t the case, then your probably in a good space. What this also means is that you need to step up your oral maintenance game.  Now, my partner hasn’t said anything in fact, I’ve been the one to go “ew” after laughing and catching a whiff of my own breath.  Thank god I keep low-sugar mints (the tiny Altoids) handy. But I often finding myself giving my mouth a scrub and mouthwash rinse twice a day.

Eep! I just talked about one of neurosis, didn’t I? Ah well. I’ve come out of the closet. Now you know I”m anal about my mouth… (nope, not gonna edit that one 🙂 )

To summarize. Unless your sick or have bad hygiene and you’re on a diet; if you have bad breath then you’re burning body fat. So congrats! (Of course there’s blood sugara levels and minimum caloric intake that need to be taken into consideration, but I’ve already touch on that.

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